Friday 22 June 2012

One Hit Wonders

This is for all the people that aren't worth a story of their own, but comical none the less. 

What Did You Say to M...

This guy will definitely warrant a story, but I'm refraining from posting about current people. But this is just too funny. 

Background: This guy takes a lot of effort. He borrows shit, borrows toilet paper to take a shit, complains about everything(there is one thing, but its too specific to his identity but trust me, you would roll your eyes-oh fuck it-he complained the popcorn texture on his ceiling was causing a large amount of dust. W.T.F?)

He's having a conversation with Dino-just run of the mill small talk which I swear is at the level of working in a bar the amount of useless talking we do. Mentions an issue with something that actually is legitimate. Before Dino can finish the sentence of, "yeah, I know, we are having problems getting someone in to fix it..." he turns around in a huff and walks away. 

Dino tries to let it go, but then hears his front door slam shut in a rage. 

Tries to let it go again, and then finally drops what she's doing and knocks on the door. Cuts him off before hello, I'm sorry can pass his lips and tears him a new one: 

I don't want to hear it. Any of it. I'm officially done with your shit show. You complain about everything, you are rude to me and we have bent over backwards to try to work with you. In fact, you owe Grid a huge thank you, because if it wasn't for him, I would have had your ass out of this building months ago. 

Then she turns and walks away. He apologized later and we have yet to see if his demeanor changes. 

Sex

Had to talk to a newer couple about the loudness, and frequency of their sexual relations. Complaints were coming in from all over the building. A guy was dying, and still took time to complain. 

Always wondered why she was so chipper in the morning. 

Drugs

One guy had left his small time dealer operation set up in the kitchen during a scheduled inspection-including scale and baggies with burned roaches in the living room. 

He ended up living in the building for a total of 30 days. 

Victory is life.

and Tears

Awkward time when a woman you barely know is crying on your shoulder. 

Oh, and...

Porn

One dude had a basket of 80's porn mags in his bedroom when he wasn't there and we were doing an inspection. 

Enough said.

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